Elon Musk has run both Tesla, America into the ground

Well, America, I hope you’re happy. Elon Musk’s electric vehicle company Tesla saw its profits plunge 71% in the first quarter, and now the billionaire who has been busy ruining the U.S. government is sad and it’s all your fault.

On an April 22 call with investors, a sullen Musk spoke of his recent preoccupation with sledgehammering government agencies under the guise of the Department of Government Efficiency.

“The DOGE team has made a lot of progress in addressing waste and fraud,” he said, despite ample evidence to the contrary. “But natural blowback from that is those who were receiving the wasteful

dollars and the fraudulent dollars will try to attack me and the DOGE team and anything associated with me.”

You see? All you wasteful-andfraudulent- dollar getters are attacking the nice rich man who, according to a Washington Post analysis, “received at least $38 billion in government contracts, loans, subsidies and tax credits” over the years that helped “seed the growth that has made him the world’s richest person.”

“Now the protests that you’ll see out there, they’re very organized. They’re paid for,” Musk lied on the investors’ call. “They’re obviously not going to admit that the reason that they’re protesting is because they’re receiving fraudulent money or that they’re the recipients of wasteful largesse, but they’re gonna come up with some other reason. But that is the real reason for the protests. The actual reason is that those receiving the waste and fraud wish to continue receiving it.”

Shame on whoever is funding all these protests, though there’s zero evidence anyone is funding these protests and the very idea of “paid protesters” is a right-wing-weirdo fantasy.

What matters here is a bunch of meanies don’t want to buy overpriced cars from a guy who fired more than 216,000 federal workers in March and mistakenly thinks he knows what he’s doing at all times. That’s rude. Americans have no business showing billionaires that their actions have consequences.

The Tesla quarterly earnings report showed the company’s auto revenue fell 20%, so now Musk has to take time away from running our country like he runs his car business – into the ground – so he can focus on running his car business further into the ground.

At least he can walk away knowing he’s accomplished very little during his time in government.

As The Wall Street Journal recently reported: “Federal spending is higher since President Trump took office even as the Department of Government Efficiency slashes contracts, cuts jobs and ends diversity programs.”

By mocking devoted public servants, dismantling government agencies that did significant good in the world and repeatedly firing people then rehiring them because he didn’t realize they were important, Musk has shown other billionaires that no matter how disliked they might be, they can always become more disliked.

And by embracing far-right political beliefs, dropping slurs aimed at people with disabilities on the social media site he bought and ruined and generally behaving like a sneering, all-powerful jerk, he has given business leaders a master class in brand evisceration.

All of that, and he still has the pomposity to believe that by devoting less time to a president whose very name is toxic and more time to a car company Musk himself made toxic, he can still fix everything.

What an amazing person. Shame on you, America, for refusing to buy Musk’s forever-tainted cars and forcing him to confront the tragic reality that boundless money still can’t buy love.

Shame, shame, shame. Follow USA TODAY columnist Rex Huppke on Bluesky at @rexhuppke .bsky.social and on Facebook at face book.com/RexIsAJerk.